75 Comments
User's avatar
According to Mimi's avatar

Touching tribute to a lovely person and to a heartfelt relationship - all because you took a risk and tried something new. Powerful lesson here.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

A very lovely person. I'm going to see her this afternoon. Life is full of opportunities. When I say no to things, there's a good possibility I might close the door on something marvelous. xo

Expand full comment
Leslie Senevey's avatar

Beautiful tribute. I'm sure it will help her loved ones celebrate her. Hope it also helps you.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Thanks, Leslie. That was my motivation for writing about her, for sure. And it does help, immensely. xo

Expand full comment
Vz's avatar

Thank you Nan for seeing and truly “getting” my beloved sister Joyce. You write beautifully. I feel you’ve brought Joyce to life for many who will never meet her. Many thanks.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Oh, Victor, thank you. It was my intention to also provide this story to the people you do know her and do love her. I'm so glad you liked it. Hope to see you soon and say hi.

Expand full comment
Chris Stanton's avatar

I think this is my favorite piece of yours yet, Nan. Simply beautiful.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Wow. Thank you, Chris. What a wonderful thing to hear from you. It was one of those essays that just poured out of me. Sending love and gratitude to you, my dear friend. xo

Expand full comment
Ann Cooper's avatar

This is really special, Nan. Thank you for sharing Joyce with us. She sounds beautiful. I hope she is able to read or hear what you wrote. Xx

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Thanks, Ann. She's not reading anymore. I read it to her the other day, and maybe Mike played it for her, too. She's a special human. I wrote this for her, but I think on some level, I was writing it for all the people in her world who love her, and will miss her when she leaves. xo

Expand full comment
Michelle Gramoglia's avatar

Nan, this is beautiful and made me cry. You have perfectly captured so many things here. Thank you for this gift….

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

I'm glad it holds meaning for you, I figured it might. Joyce is beautiful and so well taken care of by so many. You know what I mean. And thank you so much for becoming a subscriber. I hope you'll read more. Thank you for that gift and sending love and appreciation for everything you do. xo

Expand full comment
Sally French Wessely's avatar

Thank you for sharing this touching tribute with us.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Thank you for reading, Sally. xo

Expand full comment
Elizabeth Beggins's avatar

A beautiful eulogy for a memorable woman. There is no fairness in losing those dear to us. She has such a vibrant smile and, clearly, a mind to match. How all who know her must already be grieving the loss.

I hope her writings and your budding friendship will serve to mentor you in some small way in the days ahead. Hugs, Nan.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Thank you, Elizabeth. Your comment is so lovely. A lot of people love her. That’s very clear from the stories I’ve heard. It’s been also nice to get to know Mike. We talk in her room and he loves her so much. He’s been an exemplary caregiver. Very devoted. Hugs back to you. xo

Expand full comment
Elizabeth Beggins's avatar

Bless him.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Yes. He’s very sweet.

Expand full comment
Marilea C. Rabasa's avatar

A lovely rremembrance of you pouring out your heart to this lovely woman as she neared death. We can never do that enough, Nan, until the day we die.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

I agree, Marilea. It's the most important thing people can say to each other. "I love you." Right? xo

Expand full comment
Nancy Jainchill's avatar

I love this one Nan. It says so much about you, the amazing person you are, as much as it says about Joyce.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

That's so kind, Nancy. Thank you. xo

Expand full comment
Nancy Jainchill's avatar

I don't do kind. It's true.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

You might not do kind, but you are kind! I know. And thank you, lovely friend. xo

Expand full comment
Nancy Jainchill's avatar

Back atcha. xo

Expand full comment
Kim Van Bruggen's avatar

You've left me weeping and grieving for a woman I will never meet and for the mentor you desire, but can never be fully realized. Her writing (and yours) will be a gift to many I'm sure. Thanks for introducing us to Joyce. xo

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Oh, sweetie. I love you. Yeah. She's special. I can't imagine how vibrant she was before the diagnosis, but I will imagine it anyway! I hope you consider ordering her book. It really is gorgeous and wonderful example of effective memoir. I haven't forgotten about figuring out a time to catch up. XO

Expand full comment
Kim Van Bruggen's avatar

It’ll happen when meant to. Xo

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

YES! xo

Expand full comment
Christina Patterson's avatar

What a beautiful piece, Nan. I am so very sorry about your friend. xx

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Thank you, Christina.

Expand full comment
Ann Richardson's avatar

I just tried to restack with a note about why this is special and the place where you type kept getting into a tangle. Never saw this before. I tried three times and then just restacked without the note. But wanted you to know I tried.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Thanks for letting me know, Ann! xo

Expand full comment
Eileen Dougharty's avatar

Joyce sounds incredible and I'm so glad you were able to spend some time getting to know her even if it wasn't as much as you would have liked. So many people keep their feelings inside, especially when life gets tough. Good on you for writing about Joyce while she is still here, even if she's only able to listen to you in her sleep. What a gift you've made for her, for Mike, and for us....your words will keep her alive in the hearts of many ❤️

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Thanks, Eileen. She's a wonderful person. I wish there was more time to get to know her. xo

Expand full comment
Nancy Stordahl's avatar

Hi Nan,

What a lovely essay about your dear friend. You mentioned you met her too late, and I know what you meant, but maybe you met her at just the right time. Your heart was open to and ready for this particular friendship at this particular time.

I love this: "Here’s the not-so-magical thinking: we are connected at the level of our hearts. I often think of her as I write. I remember the rhythm of her sentences, her lyrical command of language, her deep emotional insights, the brilliant metaphors that bring her readers close. Our heart connection? I’ll carry that with me, always."

Such beautiful words that reflect the impact of Joyce on your heart, and therefore, on your writing, too. Now her impact reaches us, your readers, too. Thank you for sharing Joyce with us.

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Oh, Nancy. Yes, you're correct, I did meet her at just the right time. I guess what I'm trying to say that I just want more, and have to be okay with what I have. It's a connection. One I'll cherish, always. xo

Expand full comment
Cathy Joseph's avatar

Beautiful, beautiful, BEAUTIFUL! It is such a gift to be with people who touch our hearts so deeply. It's interesting that you met on Rosh Hashanah, which gave you the opportunity to start the new year with a beautiful new friend. It's so wonderful that you wrote this living eulogy. Thank you for sharing Joyce with us!

Expand full comment
Nan Tepper's avatar

Thank you for reading, Cathy! Yes, the bookends of the two holidays make it more sacred for me, in a way. I would have liked to share a meal with her, one more time. Who knows? It could happen. xo

Expand full comment