It really helps so much. I spent so much energy trying to control things outside my reach, if only in my head. A pure waste of time and energy better spent on other things! I'm feeling very grateful about this new way of approaching life and the situations that I'm presented with. xo
Thanks, Pamela! I'm better than I was too. Even though I'm sleepy and slow, because of my new life and recovery, I no longer feel dread when it comes to facing the day. That was an ever-present theme in my life. I'm pretty damn positive these days, and I'm grateful for that. xoxo
Oh that sweet spot in the bed is so yummy. From a very much not a morning person and unable to converse until the bottom of my first cup of caffeine! 💚
'Tis so very true! Just finished my puzzles, and on my second cup of coffee. Life is good, even when things around me are in disarray. It feels great to have some kind of stable center that I can locate when things get a little crazy...or a lot!
I'm always afraid that if I put one off, it won't get done. I have been know to plunge into the Wordle archives if I'm restless in the evening. Finding the grace space (love that!) is a practice that requires daily, hourly, and by the minute commitment. And some days are easier than others, for sure. But it's important to me to stay sane when so much around me is so crazy. It won't do me or anyone else any good at all if I'm a wreck, and I do not want to give my power away to these creepy monsters. Yikes. xo
A wonderful piece of writing with so much TRUTH and wisdom in it about how to stay balanced in these bizarre times. Good on you! I’m facilitating a class on “inner compass” right now. It’s the only place from which we will be useful and effective at all, in the face of everything that awaits us these days. It is a power we can consciously choose at any moment (some moments easier than others). If we practice this when we don’t necessarily need it, we get stronger at accessing those pathways of soulful being when we absolutely need it.
I'm so glad to know that you're doing this work. I come from a recovery/12-step background and I'm at a point of truly believing that the US (and other countries) have to hit bottom for there to truly be any healing all the harm being done. I will be an active witness and let Grace happen. xo
Agreed. I think the only way that this country will face how we were founded and what of those horrors still live within, is to have those forces destroy themselves (bottom out). Then we can build something new. Unfortunately, they will take so many other innocents in their wake. Our country is in the destruction phase of the life cycle (which will also affect the whole world.) But after destruction comes rebirth…
I hear you, Nan. Yes to your happiness, and to grace. Grace!
More than ever, I ask myself if my intention and inclination to lean toward hope is a form of tone deafness. Is it really just privilege talking? But I keep coming back to the awareness that without it, I'm useless. And I don't think the world needs any more useless people right now.
Fist bumping the idea of feet as a compass. Applauding you for a lovely essay!
Thanks, Elizabeth. My mother told me that HER mother used to refer to her as a "happy little moron" in only the most loving and teasing way, because my mother was such a positive young person. Although that label chafes, and makes me cringe for many reasons (one of which is I adored my grandmother and can't imagine her saying anything of the sort to anyone) I look at that descriptor to see if it fits my current sitch and outlook. I have to say no. I'm totally aware of how awful all of this is––what's happening in the US––and it brings up feelings of fear, not just for myself but of course for others as well. I really need this compass called Grace to keep me grounded and clear. I'm grateful she showed up just in time. xo
I love you’re sidling up to Grace. She’s a force, just like you. You won’t be disappointed you opened yourself up to the experience of Grace. I’m certain of it.
My favourite line, and I’m going to repeat it often to myself… “stay where your feet are.” Xo
Ahhh to meet the day in full joyful abandon, tail wagging. We can learn so much from our four-legged friends. Thank you for such a thoughtful piece, Nan!
Nan, I’m one of those who can pop out of bed ready to face the day. No coffee needed. My dear husband needs the coffee, the shower, the few hours to wake up.
How amazing that you can have a morning routine! I’ve tried to do that forever. Sometimes I write about how I fail at it. Just now, though, I am making it every weekday to a session called Worm Zoom that brings together a handful of people to write together from 6-8 am my time. But after that, all bets are off. Will I have breakfast, or tackle the email? Stretch out in the recliner and play video Solitaire? Ride the bus? The best days are the days I ride the bus.
Today I went out and had my hair cut and, as I often do, ended up in a coffee shop doing more writing—or reading others’ Substacks.
I found yours. And it was swell. As always. Thanks.
And thanks for being happy. That is a good thing for all of us.
Another great insight, Nan. Your beginning paragraphs made me think of a character in the show I'm involved with now - G&S Princess Ida. He sings about how fed up he is because he is given everything he asks for and he has 'nothing whatever to grumble at'. We can only do what we can to make our little place in the world better. And Grace is also the meaning of my name. Sending love and hugs. xx
That's right, it IS the meaning of your name, too, Ann. Our names are spelled the same way, except in different order! Wouldn't that be amazing? To live a life without a single complaint. Talk about an attitude of gratitude! Love you, my dear friend. xo
Sweet Nan. This is some glorious stuff you’re taking on. Deciding you are worthy of happiness and seeking and appreciating small (and big!) things that make you feel good. Standing firm in the belief that happiness is not hiding your head in the sand, in fact you can be a stronger force for good as an emotionally centered human. I couldn’t be more proud to call you a friend. Do your best thing, Nan. ♥️
Thank you, lovey. I feel the same about you. I've done the unbridled rage, the reactivity, the histrionics, the deep depressions over the state of the world. I really want to try giving love and peace a try. I know it's better for my well-being and hopefully will create some kind of subtle ripple effect. I can't live in anger anymore. It's a killer. xo
We share a wavelength, Nan. Such was my last week… my dearest friend died. We had several parties for my favorite human’s 67th birthday. Sorrow and joy in a duet making up the symphony of my life.
Hi Kim, I'm sorry for your loss. That's so hard. And yes, to sorrow and joy. They're both important feelings, honest and meaningful. I met a woman the other day who is dying. She conducts herself with unending grace. She moved me to tears. She's brave and clear and loved and loves. It's an important reminder that we're all finite in these human bodies we traverse our lives in. Is that all there is? I have no answer for that. But life is sweet and savory, acidic, tangy, and salty. All the feels and flavors. Aren't we lucky? xo
Nan, there is so much in this one offering that I both attach to and adore that it's hard to know where to start! So, I'll just say that a Grace snuggle sounds like the the most delicious option for navigating the world right now.
"If I start catastrophizing about what I have no control over or worrying about the future, I’ll wind up in a psych ward. Not interested." Absolutely, Nan.
I also have some "grounding" habits. Wordle (like you!), Globle, the geography one, Nerdle, the numbers one, and Duolingo. Choir, Pilates and walking are all important for my physical and mental health, whatever else is going on in my life. And writing, of course!
Yes! I wouldn't dare go near Globle or Nerdle. I have no idea where anything is. And numbers? Nah. But maybe Duolingo! Obviously I skew toward language. I'm glad you're doing self-loving things, Wendy. Hugs to you, xo
I found those “grounding” daily habits particularly important during the pandemic, especially when choir and Pilates had to go all hybrid and Zoomy, rather than face-to-face. Hugs to you too, Nan. x
I love the idea of snuggling with Grace. Beautiful!
Thanks, DK! Love you. Grace IS beautiful. xo
Beautifully expressed & reflects my own hard-won acceptance that true peace for my heart & soul lies in letting go of what is not in my control.
It really helps so much. I spent so much energy trying to control things outside my reach, if only in my head. A pure waste of time and energy better spent on other things! I'm feeling very grateful about this new way of approaching life and the situations that I'm presented with. xo
Absolutely beautiful column. And I needed it today.
I've never heard "Stay where your feet are." So good! And the reminder that we are not alone.
From, another not-a-jump-out-of-bed person (but I'm better than I used to be!).
Thanks, Pamela! I'm better than I was too. Even though I'm sleepy and slow, because of my new life and recovery, I no longer feel dread when it comes to facing the day. That was an ever-present theme in my life. I'm pretty damn positive these days, and I'm grateful for that. xoxo
Oh that sweet spot in the bed is so yummy. From a very much not a morning person and unable to converse until the bottom of my first cup of caffeine! 💚
Love!
The ritual of a slow start can be stabilizing and as you demonstrate, happy and Grace-full.
I’m raising my first cup of Morning Stability to you!
Dark or medium blend? Black or another way?
Medium roast brewed strong and tempered with whipping cream. Yes, whipping cream! Dusted with cardamom and freshly grated nutmeg.
I’m coming to your house for coffee!
'Tis so very true! Just finished my puzzles, and on my second cup of coffee. Life is good, even when things around me are in disarray. It feels great to have some kind of stable center that I can locate when things get a little crazy...or a lot!
Ha! I do all the puzzles in the morning too...in a specific order. Though I do one--Wordle--in the afternoon. Not sure why.
I am so happy you've found a space--breathing grace. I need to work on that. I'm a mess these days. You're an inspiration!
I'm always afraid that if I put one off, it won't get done. I have been know to plunge into the Wordle archives if I'm restless in the evening. Finding the grace space (love that!) is a practice that requires daily, hourly, and by the minute commitment. And some days are easier than others, for sure. But it's important to me to stay sane when so much around me is so crazy. It won't do me or anyone else any good at all if I'm a wreck, and I do not want to give my power away to these creepy monsters. Yikes. xo
A wonderful piece of writing with so much TRUTH and wisdom in it about how to stay balanced in these bizarre times. Good on you! I’m facilitating a class on “inner compass” right now. It’s the only place from which we will be useful and effective at all, in the face of everything that awaits us these days. It is a power we can consciously choose at any moment (some moments easier than others). If we practice this when we don’t necessarily need it, we get stronger at accessing those pathways of soulful being when we absolutely need it.
I'm so glad to know that you're doing this work. I come from a recovery/12-step background and I'm at a point of truly believing that the US (and other countries) have to hit bottom for there to truly be any healing all the harm being done. I will be an active witness and let Grace happen. xo
Agreed. I think the only way that this country will face how we were founded and what of those horrors still live within, is to have those forces destroy themselves (bottom out). Then we can build something new. Unfortunately, they will take so many other innocents in their wake. Our country is in the destruction phase of the life cycle (which will also affect the whole world.) But after destruction comes rebirth…
Agreed 100%.
I hear you, Nan. Yes to your happiness, and to grace. Grace!
More than ever, I ask myself if my intention and inclination to lean toward hope is a form of tone deafness. Is it really just privilege talking? But I keep coming back to the awareness that without it, I'm useless. And I don't think the world needs any more useless people right now.
Fist bumping the idea of feet as a compass. Applauding you for a lovely essay!
Thanks, Elizabeth. My mother told me that HER mother used to refer to her as a "happy little moron" in only the most loving and teasing way, because my mother was such a positive young person. Although that label chafes, and makes me cringe for many reasons (one of which is I adored my grandmother and can't imagine her saying anything of the sort to anyone) I look at that descriptor to see if it fits my current sitch and outlook. I have to say no. I'm totally aware of how awful all of this is––what's happening in the US––and it brings up feelings of fear, not just for myself but of course for others as well. I really need this compass called Grace to keep me grounded and clear. I'm grateful she showed up just in time. xo
She showed up, and/or you invited her in. ☺️
I think it’s okay to be both aware and positive. The world needs folks who look for the light.
I agree, my friend. And yes, I had to be willing for Grace to show up. xo
I love you’re sidling up to Grace. She’s a force, just like you. You won’t be disappointed you opened yourself up to the experience of Grace. I’m certain of it.
My favourite line, and I’m going to repeat it often to myself… “stay where your feet are.” Xo
Love you, Ms. Kim. I'm so happy to know you. xo
Ahhh to meet the day in full joyful abandon, tail wagging. We can learn so much from our four-legged friends. Thank you for such a thoughtful piece, Nan!
They're smart, those pups. Love them forever. And thank you, Cathy!
Nan, I’m one of those who can pop out of bed ready to face the day. No coffee needed. My dear husband needs the coffee, the shower, the few hours to wake up.
How amazing that you can have a morning routine! I’ve tried to do that forever. Sometimes I write about how I fail at it. Just now, though, I am making it every weekday to a session called Worm Zoom that brings together a handful of people to write together from 6-8 am my time. But after that, all bets are off. Will I have breakfast, or tackle the email? Stretch out in the recliner and play video Solitaire? Ride the bus? The best days are the days I ride the bus.
Today I went out and had my hair cut and, as I often do, ended up in a coffee shop doing more writing—or reading others’ Substacks.
I found yours. And it was swell. As always. Thanks.
And thanks for being happy. That is a good thing for all of us.
Thank you, Fran. You're so very kind. Yes, let's work on the happiness thing. If all of us did it, that would be an even better thing! xo
Another great insight, Nan. Your beginning paragraphs made me think of a character in the show I'm involved with now - G&S Princess Ida. He sings about how fed up he is because he is given everything he asks for and he has 'nothing whatever to grumble at'. We can only do what we can to make our little place in the world better. And Grace is also the meaning of my name. Sending love and hugs. xx
That's right, it IS the meaning of your name, too, Ann. Our names are spelled the same way, except in different order! Wouldn't that be amazing? To live a life without a single complaint. Talk about an attitude of gratitude! Love you, my dear friend. xo
Sweet Nan. This is some glorious stuff you’re taking on. Deciding you are worthy of happiness and seeking and appreciating small (and big!) things that make you feel good. Standing firm in the belief that happiness is not hiding your head in the sand, in fact you can be a stronger force for good as an emotionally centered human. I couldn’t be more proud to call you a friend. Do your best thing, Nan. ♥️
Thank you, lovey. I feel the same about you. I've done the unbridled rage, the reactivity, the histrionics, the deep depressions over the state of the world. I really want to try giving love and peace a try. I know it's better for my well-being and hopefully will create some kind of subtle ripple effect. I can't live in anger anymore. It's a killer. xo
We share a wavelength, Nan. Such was my last week… my dearest friend died. We had several parties for my favorite human’s 67th birthday. Sorrow and joy in a duet making up the symphony of my life.
Hi Kim, I'm sorry for your loss. That's so hard. And yes, to sorrow and joy. They're both important feelings, honest and meaningful. I met a woman the other day who is dying. She conducts herself with unending grace. She moved me to tears. She's brave and clear and loved and loves. It's an important reminder that we're all finite in these human bodies we traverse our lives in. Is that all there is? I have no answer for that. But life is sweet and savory, acidic, tangy, and salty. All the feels and flavors. Aren't we lucky? xo
Nan, there is so much in this one offering that I both attach to and adore that it's hard to know where to start! So, I'll just say that a Grace snuggle sounds like the the most delicious option for navigating the world right now.
I agree! Snuggling is highly called for at the moment. I think we should be doing as much of that as possible! We have each other, too, you know! xo
I’m down for a snuggle party!
I'm in, too!
"If I start catastrophizing about what I have no control over or worrying about the future, I’ll wind up in a psych ward. Not interested." Absolutely, Nan.
I also have some "grounding" habits. Wordle (like you!), Globle, the geography one, Nerdle, the numbers one, and Duolingo. Choir, Pilates and walking are all important for my physical and mental health, whatever else is going on in my life. And writing, of course!
Yes! I wouldn't dare go near Globle or Nerdle. I have no idea where anything is. And numbers? Nah. But maybe Duolingo! Obviously I skew toward language. I'm glad you're doing self-loving things, Wendy. Hugs to you, xo
I found those “grounding” daily habits particularly important during the pandemic, especially when choir and Pilates had to go all hybrid and Zoomy, rather than face-to-face. Hugs to you too, Nan. x