This is such a lovely piece Nan, so much of it resonates with my own journey. I spent a little bit of time in a twelve-step program before I went to outpatient for my eating disorder. I've found community to be such a vital part of healing. Thank you so much for sharing your work with the world. Your words and your story are so important.
Thank you for reading it, Danielle. 12 Step seems to be working for me right now. It's a process. I need to keep getting out of my own way, just like I had to with regards to writing. Some days that's harder than others. Being on Substack and being in Program are giving me glimpses into the life I've always wanted, and a very real understanding that what I want for myself is attainable, as long as I stay present, and keep doing the work. It's been a pleasure reading your work, too.
It takes so much courage to dig deep and push past the uncomfortable stuff that lies beneath our patterns of behavior. And then actually changing it! I just turned 64 and am still working at it. One thing I have found about getting older is that I am stronger and able to see the truth without panicking yet also more forgiving of myself and others.
I love this, Sharon! It's so true. Clarity changes so much. I think self-compassion and self-love are at the top of my lists of gifts I've received from doing this work. And finally stepping out of my way, and embracing the writer I am, and getting my ideas, inspirations, and observations on paper has been transformative.
Sometimes we read just the right thing.... (ironic in light of the naming of your substack and its origins)...
Thank you for this post - for the candor and the acknowledgment that none of it is easy, and there are many layers and levels to our own perception. "For now, my aim is to be patient and kind to myself as I do my recovery work. I may always be fat. Is that okay with me? I'm not sure. I do want to be healthy, and right now I'm not as healthy as I’d like to be. Ideally, I want to love my body whatever size it is. Do I? No, not really. Might I? I hope so."
Nan, you are brave to write the words "I am fat. " May that kind of honesty always accompany you on this path. We have many things in common. I too want to know the truth about my disordered eating,its origins and its lies. I no longer want to live a half life. I know patience and teachability and living myself in the present will pay off. Looking forward to the next installment! Marguerite
Thank you so much! I just looked at So Here's the Thing, and I love the name of your newsletter. My partner prefaces a lot of the opinions and ideas that she has with that expression. It made me smile to see it! Looking forward to reading more of your work.
Thank you so much and likewise. I'm looking forward to reading more of your work! So glad you liked the name...I did re-think it a million times. You made me feel better.
This is such a lovely piece Nan, so much of it resonates with my own journey. I spent a little bit of time in a twelve-step program before I went to outpatient for my eating disorder. I've found community to be such a vital part of healing. Thank you so much for sharing your work with the world. Your words and your story are so important.
Thank you for reading it, Danielle. 12 Step seems to be working for me right now. It's a process. I need to keep getting out of my own way, just like I had to with regards to writing. Some days that's harder than others. Being on Substack and being in Program are giving me glimpses into the life I've always wanted, and a very real understanding that what I want for myself is attainable, as long as I stay present, and keep doing the work. It's been a pleasure reading your work, too.
It takes so much courage to dig deep and push past the uncomfortable stuff that lies beneath our patterns of behavior. And then actually changing it! I just turned 64 and am still working at it. One thing I have found about getting older is that I am stronger and able to see the truth without panicking yet also more forgiving of myself and others.
Clarity is such a gift!
I love this, Sharon! It's so true. Clarity changes so much. I think self-compassion and self-love are at the top of my lists of gifts I've received from doing this work. And finally stepping out of my way, and embracing the writer I am, and getting my ideas, inspirations, and observations on paper has been transformative.
Thank you Eva.
So much here. So much I resemble AND desire too!
Yes, it is all 'beautiful and brave'.
Yes, I am at a point of my life AND food/body/self love acceptance that I too am searching for peace.
Today it is not an illusive leaf. It is so within my reach, as it is for you as well.
Your recovery, just in this short week, the addition of your written stories, is strengthening mine. Thank you. 🥰
Sometimes we read just the right thing.... (ironic in light of the naming of your substack and its origins)...
Thank you for this post - for the candor and the acknowledgment that none of it is easy, and there are many layers and levels to our own perception. "For now, my aim is to be patient and kind to myself as I do my recovery work. I may always be fat. Is that okay with me? I'm not sure. I do want to be healthy, and right now I'm not as healthy as I’d like to be. Ideally, I want to love my body whatever size it is. Do I? No, not really. Might I? I hope so."
Thank you for reading, and your lovely comment, and thanks for subscribing too...now I'm heading over to your neck of the woods!
I meant to say earlier... I read your “About” page.... and that’s a super cool tattoo. (I assume.)
Nan, you are brave to write the words "I am fat. " May that kind of honesty always accompany you on this path. We have many things in common. I too want to know the truth about my disordered eating,its origins and its lies. I no longer want to live a half life. I know patience and teachability and living myself in the present will pay off. Looking forward to the next installment! Marguerite
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with me. You're brave as well. Time to live life out loud, yes?
I am so glad you are doing this Nan. I’m inspired to live cleaner and keep writing. Thanks to you, Bubbelah. 🙏🏾🫶🏽🙏🏾
Much love to you Billie. I want to read your writing. xoxo
Thank you for sharing this vulnerable piece. I thought it was beautifully written.
Thank you so much! I just looked at So Here's the Thing, and I love the name of your newsletter. My partner prefaces a lot of the opinions and ideas that she has with that expression. It made me smile to see it! Looking forward to reading more of your work.
Thank you so much and likewise. I'm looking forward to reading more of your work! So glad you liked the name...I did re-think it a million times. You made me feel better.
I told my sweetie about it today, and she loved it, and we laughed. It's really kind of fabulous!
"I'm there to find peace, to be my best self, and to make a contribution to the people around me" this brings me joy... love you so much!
I'm so glad you read it, thank you, Nome.
Looking forward to reading more! ❤️
Thank you for taking this step, and bringing us along on your journey, as you do the next right thing.
Thank you, Mor for joining me. Your support means so much to me. xoxo
I hold you close in my heart, always. 🧡
Me too, you. xoxo
Beautiful and brave, just like you. ❤️
Oh, my lovely friend. Thank you so much. I'm so glad you're here.